The full list of records broken by Moyes as Manchester United boss

The Red Devils have struggled this season, with the Scot having picked up one ignominious first after another as his first season at Old Trafford continues on a downward curve

David Moyes has overseen a record-breaking season at Manchester United - but for all the wrong reasons.

Sunday's defeat at Everton means that the defending champions cannot finish in the top four this season, the first time they have failed to qualify for the Champions League since 1995.

The result also gifted the Toffees their first league double over United since 1969-70.

The below list was first published on Goal following the 3-0 home defeat to Manchester City at the end of March, but has been updated to reflect yet more unwanted records from a nightmare season.

MOYES'S UNWANTED RECORDS AT MAN UTD

	United are guaranteed to finish the season with their lowest ever Premier League points tally
	United fail to qualify for the Champions League for the first time since 1995
	United's worst home league form for over a decade
	Suffered three defeats in a row for the first time since 2001 this season
	Eliminated in the FA Cup third round - something which happened just once under Ferguson
	First ever home defeat to Swansea this term
	First home defeat to Newcastle since 1972
	First home defeat to West Brom since 1978
	First league defeat to Stoke since 1984
	First time United conceded a first-minute goal in the Premier League - Dzeko for City
	First time Man City & Liverpool have beaten United home & away since Premier League's inception
	First time Everton, Man City & Liverpool have beaten United home & away since Premier League's inception
	First time Everton have beaten United home and away since 1969-70
	First time Everton & Liverpool have ever done a league double over United in the same season

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'Nothing interesting about being married except that it saves you money' - 2Shotz

Talking about what marriage has taught him in a recent interview with Punch, rapper 2shotz, who got married exactly one year ago, said there's really nothing interesting about married life except for companionship and the money it saves you...

"I have learnt a lot of things they just never tell you. There is no interesting thing about being married except for the companionship and it saves you some money. You no longer have to eat out and you don’t have to spend money on a couple of girls. Now, it’s just your wife. It also prevents you from doing some things that are either promiscuous or unnecessary".

His wife Precious also explained how they met on Twitter. People are really finding love on social media. Continue to read what she said...


Precious: I met him on Twitter. I can’t remember who followed who first, but I remember he put up a picture of his apartment and I commented without knowing who he was.  He thanked me and we got talking. We moved the conversation from Twitter to phone, then to Skype. I was in Ireland, came to Nigeria for Christmas and we met in person.

How would you describe being married?

Precious: It has been good and different because you have this person who is always telling you what to do. It took me time to get used to having to submit wholly .In Ireland, I started making my own money at age 16 and by the time I was 18, I had my own apartment. I had become used to being independent.

Is there anything you would like to change about each other?

2shotz: Her mouth. You know how women talk, they are never satisfied.

Precious: That I don’t like certain things about him does not mean I can’t live with it. But I will like him to be less stubborn. He is an Igbo man who is deeply rooted in the Igbo culture which makes him think in a certain way. At times, he is not willing to bend the rules just to make it happen. I am just learning the values and tradition of my people.

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Gunmen attack secondary school staff quarters today, kill 5-year-old

Boko Haram men in the early hours of today April 20th attacked the Government Girls Secondary School (GGSS), Yana, killing a 5year old girl and setting some buildings in the staff quaters ablaze.

The Bauchi State Police spokesperson, DSP Haruna Mohammed while confirming the incident said the gunmen stole a private vehicle belonging to the Principal of the School and also destroyed a bank vault

“Unknown gunmen attacked the staff quarters of GGSS Yana, Shira Local Government Area of Bauchi State, around 2.30am on Sunday. They set the school bus ablaze; and in the process, a five-year-old girl was killed in the fire while they destroyed the vault of a bank,’’ he said

He said a combined team of security forces are on the trail of the attackers.

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Chris Abani’s Secret History of Las Vegas

Books have their destinies. See if this book is destined to have you as its reader.

Don’t mop around all weekend, staring at your Kindle or Ipad without a clue what novel to read. Head to Amazon and download Secret History of Las Vegas {here} a new crime thriller by the Nigerian novelist, Chris Abani. It’s a heart-thumping thriller. Trust Abani of Graceland fame to load up enough drama and plot twists to get you through in lightening speed.

Oh, and don’t be fooled by the title into thinking the novel is purely American. It might surprise you, but as one of the characters in the novel observes, “Vegas is really an African city.” Besides, the novel features African characters. For people who care about such things, Secret History of Las Vegas is a proper African crime thriller.

Anyway, on to the juicy synopsis—

There are three main characters you want to keep an eye out for: Sunil Singh is a mixed-race South African psychiatrist—half Indian, half Zulu. During Apartheid, he worked in an institute notorious for experimenting on humans. Apartheid may have ended, but people like Sunil are never out of work for too long. There is always someone devilish enough to require their skill-set. When the story begins, a prestigious research institute has brought him to Las Vegas to work on a project funded by the US military—to produce a drug controlling psychopathic behavior for humans.

It just so happens that when Detective Salazar discovers body dumps of murdered homeless men in the city, he calls Sunil to help him figure things out. Salazar has arrested a co-joined twins—named Water and Fire—found hanging around the crime scene. The twins are scary and mysterious, but they’re also adorable. Water is tall, drop-dead gorgeous and mellow. His brother, Fire, who is attached to his chest, is a blob of flesh sprouting two hands, but he is as feisty, talkative, and charming as a talk-show host. But Salazar doesn’t trust them one bit. He is convinced that they are either responsible for the body dumps or hiding something just as bad. But it doesn’t take long for the story to spin out of control as Sunil, Salazar, and the bizarre twin are drawn deeper and deeper into a dark, twisted tale of gruesome murders, freak shows, haunting desert ghost-towns, fatal betrayals, prostitution, forbidden love, and government conspiracy.

Abani brings his storytelling A-game, so the novel is bound to get you hooked from the start. For those of you who just want a deliciously dark novel with dizzying plot twists, click on that download link and start reading. But feel free to dig deeper into the story for larger meanings, if you care about such things. We all know and love Abani for his novels, but the guy is also a brilliant thinker. Dude can philosophize for days. So while Secret History is straight up fun to read, if you’re hankering for deeper meanings about politics and history, there’s enough layers to unravel.
Download Secret History of Las Vegas {here}

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Ice Prince's dilemma; man wants him to perform at his wedding, but bride is his ex

Lol. The rapper wants to know how much you would charge if you're called to perform at your ex-girlfriend's wedding. Most people told him to do it for free as a gift to the ex...what do you think?

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Don’t keep secrets…’: 12 relationship rules you should definitely ignore

Make sure you have alone time that doesn’t just consist of him sitting next to you while you watch Scandal each week, but don’t freak out if suddenly he can’t take you out on Friday.

Just because you broke up with someone in the past doesn’t mean your future relationship is doomed.

1. “Your partner should be your best friend.”

Your partner does not have to be your best friend. Your FRIENDS should be your friends. Your partner should have sex with you in bed (or elsewhere) and go to the hospital with you when your sister gives birth. If he doesn’t also braid your hair while you watch Frozen and enthuse over the dawning of rosé-drinking season, that doesn’t mean your love isn’t true and deep.

2. “You have to be each other’s plus-one at every celebration or family event.”

If his friends are throwing a party, and you don’t know them that well and are coming down with the flu, stay home! He can function on his own. Send a nice note and a gift, and curl up with Sex and the City reruns, and don’t worry about it.

3. “Learn to enjoy doing things your partner loves.”

You don’t have to love the same things. If he loves golf and you do not, you do not have to watch golf with him. Just like you’d rather go to the Beyoncé concert with someone who isn’t rolling his eyes in the corner, he’d rather watch golf with a fellow enthusiast.

4. “Never go to bed angry.”

Sometimes you need to sleep on it so you wake up and realize how silly you were both acting last night when you had a huge fight over who got all those crumbs in the couch crevices.

5. “Split chores evenly.”

If he does 90 percent of the laundry and that works for your lifestyle, GREAT! The balance of who does more housework will ebb and flow over the course of the relationship, and as long as you’re not stuck doing all of it, that’s just fine.

6. “Set aside one night a week for date night.”

It’s hard to keep to a set day each week. Make sure you have alone time that doesn’t just consist of him sitting next to you while you watch Scandal each week, but don’t freak out if suddenly he can’t take you out on Friday.

7. “Don’t keep secrets from each other.”

There are some things he doesn’t need to know. Like if your mom said she can’t believe he wore those shoes? Telling him will just hurt his feelings and potentially cause a big fight.

8. “If you break up and get back together, it will never work.”

Sometimes breakups make you realize how much you love a person and don’t want to be without him. Knowing how to forgive each other will only make your relationship stronger.

9. “Pick your battles.”

If something’s bothering you, say something. A lot of people tend to under-communicate in a relationship, which can lead to passive aggression.

10. “You shouldn’t have to ask someone to make time for you.”

Sometimes you need to tell someone what you need. And if you need more time together, there’s nothing wrong with asking your partner for it.

11. “Don’t listen to your friends.”

If ALL of your friends have the same gripe about someone you’re with, maybe you should listen to them.

12. “Don’t talk about your ex.”

While you shouldn’t go on and on about your past relationship, it’s fine for your current guy to know what your ex did that drove you crazy. Besides, people kind of like hearing about how much better they are than the last person their partner dated

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7 most interesting Easter traditions around the world

For some people, Easter is something more than just numerous sweet cakes, painted eggs and chocolate bunnies.

Soon all Christians around the world will celebrate Easter that is considered to be one of the greatest religious holidays. There are so many reasons due to which most of us look forward to this special day. First of all, it is a wonderful time when we gather with our friends and relatives to enjoy festive and cheerful atmosphere in our homes. The main idea of this marvelous holiday is Jesus Christ’s resurrection and the beginning of new life. For some people, Easter is something more than just numerous sweet cakes, painted eggs and chocolate bunnies. In order to realize all the significance of this religious event they keep fasting that traditionally starts 40 days before Good Friday. When finally Easter comes, lots of people attend early church services and then they regale themselves with various tasty foods and have fun with their families. It seems that we know everything about Easter and its celebration, however there are some interesting and unusual Easter traditions from different countries that will certainly surprise you. Take a look at the list below to get more information about them.

1. Let Them Eat Egg

Eggs have become an indispensable part of our festive menu at Easter. Traditionally, we paint them and use to decorate our Easter table or other places of our home. Besides, chocolate eggs are extremely popular these days and they are generally served as a dessert on this day. Perhaps, you’ll be astonished to know that in some countries omelette is the dish number one cooked to celebrate this unique holiday. For example, this is one of the biggest Easter traditions that are observed across France. A lot of festivals are organized at the central squares of most towns where people cook a huge omelette using about 5000 eggs and as a result this dish is enough to feed almost 1,000 people.

2. Don’t Let Men Knead the Dough

The Easter bread is a traditional and the most popular food that represents the sacred meaning of the holiday. All the women are expected to bake this sweet and delicious cake for their family members. There is such a tradition in Poland according to which men are forbidden to make the Easter bread as it is believed that the dough will not rise when they knead it.

3. Lords of the Dance

If you go to a small town of Bacup that is situated in the North of England, you’ll have an incredible opportunity to discover another unusual Easter tradition. All the visitors can watch the Nutter’s Dance on Easter Saturday. In spite of the strange name this dance has, you will not see any mad people there. At first, this strange tradition appeared in the town in the 18th century. Here you will be fascinated with a fantastic folk dance performed by a group of men dressed in skirted black, white and red costumes with special garlands on their necks. Usually, there is the Whiffler in front of the dancers who cracks his whip. It is believed that in such way he will ward off evil spirits. This dance is considered to come from Moorish sailors who settled on that territory long time ago. But nobody can explain why this event happens on Easter Saturday.

4. Domestic Violence Is Good for You


If you are greatly concerned about your health and beauty, this funny Easter tradition is exactly for you. It is mostly popular with countries such as Poland, Czech Republic, Hungary and Slovakia. Easter Monday is the day when the men can pour water on girls and even spank them with a whip of willow. People of these countries are strongly convinced that this tradition will help them to become more beautiful and healthier. It should be mentioned that most countries where an Orthodox population prevails tend to keep this celebration. We just can notice slight differences on certain areas.

5. Beware Greeks Throwing Pots

Due to the fact that Easter is the most significant holiday in the Orthodox calendar, dozens of festivals are held in Greece during Easter time. If you are eager to see the most interesting and weird traditions of this country, you’d better go to Corfu where the citizens throw their pots and crockery out of the windows. You should be extremely careful while going near their houses as it can be dangerous to your health. You can witness this strange tradition on Easter Saturday. What is the origin of such an unusual behavior Greeks demonstrate every year? Unfortunately, you will not find any clear explanation of this odd tradition as there are several theories concerning it. For instance, some people claim that by throwing pots out of their homes they reject Judas, while others believe that this tradition will help them to get rid of evil. The rest of Greeks are sure this custom symbolizes the change of the season so they must be ready for spring and summer without old things in their houses.

6. Reading Detectives


I think this is the strangest Easter tradition I’ve ever heard about. Even if you are not much interested in Norway and its culture I advise you to get more information about this unusual custom. Do you know that in this country Easter is a bank holiday celebrated for 5 days? All the shops and state offices are closed at this time. Consequently, Norwegians stay at home with their families and they can’t find any other way to celebrate Easter but to read plenty of detective stories. You shouldn’t expect to see anything different on TV these days because crime thrillers are frequently broadcasted on every channel. And finally you’ll be surprised to see juice or milk cartons with printed mystery stories on their sides.

7. Egg Knocking


It is typical of most Christian countries to practice the lucky egg game on Easter. To my mind, this activity is worth trying in every family, especially if you have kids, as it will bring them joy and pleasure. For this you need to take hardboiled eggs and try to break them in all possible ways. If you have an unbroken egg at the end of this game, you will be lucky and happy throughout the next year. Every country performs this cheerful tradition in its own special way and this game has different names around the world. Though, egg knocking or egg tapping are the most widely used words for this activity.

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